ARTIST'S IMPOSTER SYNDROME
How to overcome Imposter Syndrome as an artist; and a reminder that you are not alone
I am writing this for my fellow artists / art-lovers / human beings who might be doubting themselves right now. I see you, and I have been there. If you can take away one thing from this blog post, please let it be that EVERYBODY feels like this sometimes, and it is (from what I can gather) a normal part of the human existence – but don’t let it stop you chasing your dreams!
That being said, Imposter Syndrome is the most bizarre feeling.
I had heard so much about it and thought I understood what it is – but that was very different to actually experiencing it.
The worst instance of imposter syndrome that I have endured was 3 days before my solo exhibition, ‘Triple Vision’.
As the opening date approached I became certain that my weeks, months and years of hard-work meant nothing, and I had no reason to be sharing it with the world. I was completely convinced that my friends and family had been lying to me throughout my early career, and that in reality, my work was embarrassingly childish and downright terrible.
The conviction with which these thoughts spiralled through my head was terrifying, and though I had experienced minor episodes of imposter syndrome previously, this time nothing anybody said or did made me feel better.
The realities of these strange and negative head-spaces is that, sometimes we don’t necessarily ‘overcome’ them, so much as ‘move through’ them. For me, all that could help was the passage of time and the knowledge that no matter what, the show was happening and that I had tried my best.
Of course, deep breaths and a wonderfully supportive partner massively helped, but that feeling didn’t fully disappear until after the show, when I had proof that people were smiling and enjoying my work rather than wincing and wrinkling their noses in distaste.
Making art can be so tricky because as much as I’d like to say that ‘other people’s opinions mean nothing to me’, and that ‘I am happy in my own work and process’, that would be a lie.
Of course I adore making my work for me, and the process of creating is very important in any practice, but so is sharing. I believe that artists make art to communicate in ways we don’t otherwise have words for; how can we converse with an empty room?
So much of my practice is spent in isolation that sharing work with an audience is bound to feel scary, but it is a vital part of being an artist. Human beings are inherently social and require community. No matter how independent or confident, reassurance from other people never goes amiss.
This is perhaps why, my immersive exhibition ‘Triple Vision’ was so focused on the experiential aspect of art. My work is highly focused on interaction and therefore, it felt like it was at the mercy of it’s audience, possibly furthering my fear of their reactions.
In this instance, I think it is important to assume that most people are lovely and genuinely want the best for you. I find that remembering this can provide the morsel of encouragement you need to push through self-doubt and make it to the other-side of whatever is causing these feelings!
Despite sounding trite, it genuinely is a case of one foot in front of the other, task by task until enough time has passed that you have a bank of evidence to disprove any critical internal voices in the future – at least, I hope so!
While this blog post is primarily rooted in my own experiences, I want it to be a reminder to you, dear artist / art admirer / human being, that it is so normal to feel vulnerable and scared when you put yourself out there. Pursuing something meaningful to you will always come with drawbacks and worries – But please, I implore you to do it anyway.
The fear means that you care!
And as a final note if you are currently feeling this way, please know that I personally would love to see whatever it is you might be feeling nervous about showing the world.
I believe in you 🙂
